The key to a successful negotiation isn’t the actual negotiation. The key is understanding how to get a peek into the other sides Playbook.
Negotiate like a Pro! Setting the stage to get what you want
Did you know that the key to successfully negotiating anything in life, isn’t the actual negotiation itself? Sure, that part is important and there are key techniques to use once there. No, the secret to getting what you want…. is learning the other sides Playbook. How do you do this? You get them to tell you during the Fact-FindingStage.
The Fact-Finding Stage is the absolute Holy Grail on which all else is built. Doing it effectively gives you a peek inside the other sides Playbook! Meaning their thought-process, their strategy and their drivers (what’s most important to them). Knowing their Playbook gives you the tools to build an effective negotiation strategy.
To learn their Playbook – use the 4 Elements of the Fact-Finding Stage:
1. Resist the temptation to start negotiating during the Fact-Finding stage. Your job during this stage is to ask questions & listen intently.
2. Spend 90% of the time listening and 10% asking open-ended questions
3. Dig deeper by using – Why, What & Tell Me More. The objective is to get as much useful information as possible by digging deep.
4. Use the Power of Silence
Think of it like a trial lawyer. A good trial lawyer doesn’t just waltz into the courtroom and start hammering everyone. Before stepping foot into the courtroom, she has patiently listened and learned everything she can about the facts of the case, and the position that other side is going to take. Now that she understands the lay of the land, she has prepared an effective strategy!
Every Badass Boss-Lady knows how to use the Fact-Finding Stage to get key info!
1. Resist the temptation to start negotiating anything. Wait until the end.
Why? Because it’s too early in the game. The Fact-Finding stage is the time to listen, learn and assess whether the product or service is even a potential fit! Let the salesperson do most of the talking – and really, truly listen. You will be amazed at what they will share, when you simply let them talk! The info will most always serve you later.
Equally important, negotiating terms or price signals that you are interested in buying – which is basically tipping your hand! By simply listening and asking questions, the salesperson knows you’re interested but feels they haven’t yet sold you. Let them continue working for your business.
2. Spend 90% listening and 10% asking lots of open-ended questions.
Open-ended questions are questions that can’t be answered with yes or no. They net the greatest amount of information. Look at the difference in the information you get from these examples:
Yes or No Question:
Did you have a good day?
Answer: Yup.
Open-ended Question:
Tell me all about your day…
Answer: It was good. I had a meeting that went really well and it looks like we’re going to move forward with the deal this next month. Then I went to lunch and ran into so-and-so…did you know that they…..
Way more info asking the Open-Ended Question – right? You get the point!
3. Dig deeper with Why, What & Tell Me More
Your objective is to create a friendly, open dialogue where the other side feels comfortable sharing information freely. In the beginning, people may give responses that feel extra guarded or scripted – even when answering open-ended questions. That’s typical as you’re just starting to get to know each other.
When this happens, I simply dig deeper by asking a Why, What or Tell Me More question: “That’s interesting – tell me more on your reasoning behind that.” Then I shut my mouth and listen!
4. Use the Power of Silence.
Ever heard the saying, “She who speaks first, loses”? The translation is – she who speaks first, tips her hand, giving the other side the advantage. Be mindful of the Power of Silence. Strategically holding your tongue is a highly effective way to gain valuable insight into the other persons position, mindset and potential strategy. In other words – their Playbook!
Here’s why:
People feel uncomfortable when there is a lull in the conversation. Our natural tendency is to fill in the gap by talking….about anything! As long as that awkward silence is filled! This is especially true of salespeople. I can say this because I am one – and I’ve hired, managed and trained hundreds of them. Believe me – we like to talk and hate awkward silences, especially with a potential client!!
Here is how I use the Power of Silence in 2 common situations:
During a lull in the conversation:
I consciously and mindfully bite my tongue and stay silent. Yes! I really, really DO want to fill the gap with chatter – but I resist. The burden of filling in that gap silently passes to the other person. 10 times out of 10, they’ll “blink,” and I’ll learn more info. Score!
When a response is too short or guarded & I need more info – I use Silence in 1 of 2 ways:
1. Murmur – “Hmmm. Interesting.” Then stay silent. 10 out of 10 times, they’ll start explaining more in an attempt to clarify. That usually nets you more useful information.
2. Dig deeper with Why, What or Tell me More. Very effective.
Knowledge is power. Before you start hammering out final pricing, terms, or nice little extras you’d like thrown in – you are in a much more advantageous position if you understand the inner workings of the other sides situation, their driver(s), motivation and what’s most important to them. This will dictate what you ask for – and how much.
Yes! The more information you have about the entire landscape, the higher the chance of getting exactly what you want.
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